Tuesday, August 23, 2005
Favours
You come to know that a person you care for and take as a friend with was being talked about unfairly by someone behind their back. You, out of loyalty and feelings, inform your friend about it. You got involved only because you wanted to stop people telling unfair things about your friend. You trusted your friend not to do anything that may hurt you because of this. You were doing them a favour, weren't you?
It seems to me that people will put you in a deep sh.t when it comes to their own welfare. I am not sure until I confront my friend but it appears that my favour is being used to smooth over my friend's situation and as a consequence I could end up with a problem. When will I learn?
On the other hand, could my faith on love and loyalty be upheld and my friend did not or do not take any action that may create trouble for me?
I hope whole heartedly that the latter is true.
It seems to me that people will put you in a deep sh.t when it comes to their own welfare. I am not sure until I confront my friend but it appears that my favour is being used to smooth over my friend's situation and as a consequence I could end up with a problem. When will I learn?
On the other hand, could my faith on love and loyalty be upheld and my friend did not or do not take any action that may create trouble for me?
I hope whole heartedly that the latter is true.
# posted by butterflyuk : 8/23/2005 11:33:00 pm
Comments:
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I must say, it is a sticky situation that you've worked yourself into, albeit with all good intent. Unfortunately, the saying does go that "nice [gals] finish last", and is often proven true.
My best advice, without knowing any further details, would be to confront your frend about it calmly, and thoroughly express your feelings about what is going on. Make sure they know that you were only relaying the information to them for their own defense, with their best interest at heart, and you don't want to get yourself caught up in the middle of it.
I'm always here if you want someone to talk to more on this. I hope things work out well.
- Iszi
My best advice, without knowing any further details, would be to confront your frend about it calmly, and thoroughly express your feelings about what is going on. Make sure they know that you were only relaying the information to them for their own defense, with their best interest at heart, and you don't want to get yourself caught up in the middle of it.
I'm always here if you want someone to talk to more on this. I hope things work out well.
- Iszi
Hi, It's great to hear from you and I appreciate your support. Yes I will confront my friend first and take it from there. Welcome back.
I've been in the same position before and it's not nice. It's sad that sometimes the best approach is not to get involved at all.
# posted by 
: 9:47 pm
: 9:47 pm
Illegally Blonde, I do agree that sometimes it's better not to get involved, but then one is usually left with a feeling of guilt afterwards, thinking "Maybe this friend of mine wouldn't be hurting so bad if I'd warned them before.". Also, it's better for your friend to hear it directly from you, than to possibly hear from another person, and also hear that you withheld knowledge.
So you really win and lose either way, and the only true way you can measure the pros and cons of your decision in these scenarios is on a case-by-case basis, and also to make a mental note of how things work out in the end for future reference.
- Iszi
[Edit]
Bah, I can't stand that we can't edit our own comment posts. (Blogger default?) The previous (deleted) post had a grammatical error that I just couldn't stand to let fly, and I had to trash the whole thing just to fix it. Oh, well. The world spins on.
[/Edit]
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So you really win and lose either way, and the only true way you can measure the pros and cons of your decision in these scenarios is on a case-by-case basis, and also to make a mental note of how things work out in the end for future reference.
- Iszi
[Edit]
Bah, I can't stand that we can't edit our own comment posts. (Blogger default?) The previous (deleted) post had a grammatical error that I just couldn't stand to let fly, and I had to trash the whole thing just to fix it. Oh, well. The world spins on.
[/Edit]
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